4 tips 4 taking care of your feet

Did you know that the state of your feet can have a major influence on your posture?

How do your feet feel today?  Do they feel cramped in your shoes?  Do they get tired or painful?  Do you tend to favor one part of the foot when you stand?  Or do you not really pay much attention to them?  They get you around and that's enough...

How do you think about your feet? A lot of people see and feel their feet as sort of blocks attached to the ankle joints.  Flippers that we walk with.  But...

Did you know that there are 33 joints in each of your feet? 

Your feet are your foundation, your base of support.  If they are tight, collapsed, or you're not distributing weight through them evenly, then you're working with a narrower base...a little like the difference between standing and walking on ice skates verses standing and walking on snow shoes (Ok, our feet should defiitely be more mobile than snow shoes, but I'm talking about surface area making good contact with the groud.)

So how do our feet get so tight and distorted??? 

Here are four key reasons.  Some may seem obvious.  Others may surprise you.  And I've offered a tip for each one!

1. Footwear that resticts the feet (probably the most obvious).  Shoes and some socks and tights.  Yes, socks and tights can restrict the feet.

TIP:  Think about tossing any socks or tights that scrunch up your toes.  You don't have to replace all of your shoes, but try and buy shoes with a toe box on the roomier side and check to make sure you're buying the right size.  People often wear shoes a half to a full size too small.

2. Boring walking surfaces  (In New York City, everyone's always talking about being over-stimulated, most people's feet are probably vastly understimulated from walking on flat surfaces so much of the time.  The feet don't really have much to move and respond to)

TIP:  Make a point to walk on slightly uneven surfaces when you can...even if you can't go on a hike...think like a kid and perposly walk on the uneven part of the sidewalk (Don't do this if you're worried about tripping)

3. Sitting - Yes, sitting.  If your feet aren't on the floor when you sit, they're doing something.  Maybe you're sitting on them or tucking them being the wheelbase of your chair for eight hours/day.  

TIP:  Time yourself in 5-minute increments and see if you can keep your feet flat on the floor at your desk.

4. More general postural patterns - Maybe you favor one side or have scoliosis, your neck and shoulders are tense, or you have some lower back issues.  The problem may not start in the feet, but the feet are part of the postural pattern and undoing harmful patterns can be helped tremendously by addressing the feet.

TIP:  Try to balance your weight evenly on both feet and see if that changes anything in your back, neck, and shoulders

How do you feel if you pay more attention to your feet? Want to learn more? Check out lessons and classes!

What kind of sitter are you?

What kind of sitter are you?

Is there a right way to sit to have good posture?

When people sign up for posture classes, they often expect to learn the right way to sit, the right way to stand, walk, etc.  There's often this idea that "good posture" is a held position, but people find that they are quite uncomfortable trying to hold it.

Here's the secret....Good posture isn't about holding a right position and if you're trying to do that, you're probably interfering with good posture, movement and breathing.  So, on that note, I don't believe that there is one right way to sit. 

Ergonomic guidelines are helpful, but the truth is that we all have different work habits and personalities.  Some people like to be up-close-and personal with their screen and these folks usually find that their "ergonomic" office chair doesn't support them sitting this way.  Others like to lean back a bit, which is not a problem unless you're sliding down the seat and putting a lot of pressure on your lower back.

I've spent nearly 13 years helping people with their desk posture and I begin any workspace consultation with a questions....How do you tend to sit?  What are your work habits?  What movements are you doing most often (ie. mouse, phone, typing, jotting down notes on a pad)? 
Once I figure out what the person is doing and how they tend to do it, then I can show them how to do it with better posture and less strain...a lot more nuanced then simply showing a diagram of how to sit correctly. 

So....before you start adjusting your desk, take the quiz and find out what kind of sitter you are.  In my experience, there tend to be four types of sitters as pertains to sitting at a desk and working at the computer.  That doesn't mean there aren't more types!  And of course there's also the standing desk...but I'll leave that for another quiz!

Posture and Communication Workshop - 15 Reasons This Workshop Could Be For You

Would you like to gain new tools to feel more poised and confident while communicating...in just about any situation?

Women have been asking me exactly who this workshop is for and what they should expect to get out of it. 

Check out these 15 different reasons to take a Posture Under Pressure workshop...and find out if it's for you

1.  You are passionate about something and you want that passion to be infectious when you talk about it.

2.  You want to put your best foot forward at your next job interview.

3. You're an introvert and generally feel uncomfortable socializing in groups or meeting new people.

4.  You're a presenter or teacher and you'd like to make a better connection with your audience/students.

5.  You have an intense fear of public speaking.

6.  You don't have an intense fear of public speaking, but you'd like to feel more comfortable and less stressed doing it.

7.  You'd like to feel more energized and less exhausted after a day when you are interacting with a lot of friends, family, or co-workers.

8.  You're an energetic extrovert and love to talk, but would like to work on slowing down, conserving your energy, and becoming a better listener.

9.  You feel like you loose yourself when your having a conversation and become completely absorbed by other person.

10.  You often feel self-conscious or nervous when speaking with others.

11.  You're totally unaware of your body language and posture when you're speaking.

12.  You're aware of your body language and posture, but have no idea how to change it.

13.  You're often short of breath when you speak.

14.  You rush when you speak to make sure you get to say everything you want to say.

15.  You'd like simple tools for recharging during/after an over-stimulating day.

Whether you relate to one, five or all of the above points, this workshop can help you figure out how to come across the way you'd like to and have more rewarding interactions in all sorts of situations.

Interested?  Click here!

Don't Be a Bad Astronaut...Have Good Posture Instead!

Have you ever have a friend come up to you with a dejected look and say, "I'm a bad astronaut.  It must be genetic."

Has anyone ever insisted that you need to get fluent in Portuguese, learn to play the saxophone, and hit a home run by the end of breakfast?  

Ridiculous, right?  Genetic?  It takes years of study, skill development, and determination to become an astronaut.  How could you be bad at something you've never done?  And how could anyone be expected to learn to speak a language, play a musical instrument, or a sport by the end of a meal?  Clearly impossible!

It's more likely that you've heard a dejected friend say, "My posture is terrible.  It must be genetic."

And you may have heard a loved one suggest you sit up straight as you're slouching over your cereal or smartphone.

Posture tends to be placed in a category something that can should be fixed instantly and maintained and if it isn't, well then it must mean you're lazy...Or as some kind of genetic trait like eye color that obviously runs in the family because... well...look at Aunt Petunia's posture!

When I hear someone say that they just have bad posture and doubt anything can be done, I feel a little like they're saying they're a bad astronaut (unless of course they actually are an astronaut!) Changing your posture doesn't require an advanced degree, but it's not a doomed state of being, nor is it genetic, or something that you should be expected to "fix" at the drop of a hat.  If you find that it's difficult to fix on your own, that's normal.  You're not lazy. 

Changing your posture requires some knowledge and skill.  Many people are frustrated, thinking they can't fix their posture no matter how hard they try.  The trouble is though, that they haven't been trying correctly.  Once they learn to try correctly, it improves. The attempts at quick fixes (ie. throwing your shoulders back) can actually make matters worse.  

Good posture is about finding a dynamic state of balance in the body, not a position that must be held.  (Whew!  Good news!  Holding a position can get pretty uncomfortable.)  Alexander Technique lessons help you correctly sense when you're in balance and when you're not, so you don't just learn correct posture...you learn how to feel what correct posture feels like.  

Getting clear on what good posture is helps you to improve it and keep improving.  And it feels good.  And you feel competent because you can learn to do it yourself and you're not just doing the old "stand up straight" thing that doesn't work.

If you haven't already check out my free sitting guide to start to change how you try to fix your posture....

...and sign up for some lessons or classes so you'll become the posture astronaut you were always meant to be!

Pain in the Neck?

Do you ever have neck pain?

The problem might be your head...and I don't mean in your mind.  The actual weight of your head could be putting pressure on your neck as you go about your daily activities, depending on how you go about them.

If you've ever wondered how an ostrich manages with such a long, thin neck, look at the tiny size of it's head.  By contrast, average adult human head weighs about 10-12 lbs and if you're dropping it down to look at your phone or to look at the ground directly in front of you when walking, you're pulling the weight of a bowling ball down, creating pressure in your spine and maybe some discomfort in your neck and back.  Any part of you below your head could potentially be affected by that downward pressure.

Want to improve your posture?  Don't put your head in the sand!  Start with noticing where your head goes as you go about your day.

Here are a few simple tips...

1.  Looking at your phone?  Try nodding instead of dropping your head.  Lift your phone to about chest level and close to your body.

2.  Walking and don't want to trip or step in dog poo?  Look at the ground a bit ahead of you instead of directly in front of you.  

3.  At the computer?  Pull your chair closer to your desk so you're not pitching forward to see your screen.

4.  Reading a book while sitting?  Similar to the phone.  Nod your head (don't drop it) to look at the book.  Put a pillow or bag/backpack on your lap to support your arms while raising the book.

5.  In general...notice when you move you're head if you are consistently pushing you face forward or dropping your head down.  Just noticing how you're moving can start to change your habits.

Want to learn more?  Check out my lessons and classes…

Conquer the Butterflies with Better Posture!

Have you ever thought about your breathing and how it relates to your posture?

When I was a college student I did a weekly news segment on the campus radio station and I'd always get butterflies right before I read the news live over the air.  It was also around this time that I started taking Alexander Technique lessons.  I was learning a lot about my posture, breathing, and how I used my body, but I had to pick one thing to focus on in that moment  when the butterflies hit me so that I wouldn't choke up and sound out of breath an gravelly.

I had noticed that in preparation to read the news, or even any time I had to speak in front of people, that I would have the butterfly sensation and then I'd feel my legs tense up and I'd feel like I was floating off the ground.  When I'd then start to speak, I'd feel short of breath.

So sitting at the microphone at the radio station, I planted both feet on the floor and the one instruction I gave myself was to release the tension in my thighs.  I didn't move anything.  I just focused on it.

And it worked!  

Despite being nervous, it was much easier to speak and I felt much more relaxed.

Image by Andrzej Rembowski from Pixabay

It would be difficult to change postural habits without looking at breathing or breathing habit without looking at posture.

If your posture (the way you're holding yourself up) is out of balance, there's likely tension, compression or both in your body, which can interfere with your breathing.  

Speaking is a great test for this.  If you tend to feel out of breath when you speak, you're probably doing extra work take a breath in that you don't really need to do.  People often think of that extra work or tension as happening in the upper body, which it absolutely can be and that's usually where we see and hear it, but there's another side of what happens when we breath and speak and it's what we're doing with our legs.  If your legs tend to be tense or you tense them when you speak, that tension will likely pull up into your abdomen and affect your breathing.

Working on your posture and how your whole body coordinates can help you to release tension you don't need in your legs and also get your feet to make better contact with the ground, all of which help with breath and voice.

So as an experiment...next time you feel a little nervous or even just a bit tense when you have to speak, make sure you have both feet on the ground and see if you can let go of a little tension in your legs and notice if it's a little easier to speak or if your voice sounds different.

To learn more about how to achieve balance in how you use your body, breathing and voice when you communicate, check out my Posture Under Pressure workshops for women.  We'll look at and practice that moment that happens right before you speak so you can start off by putting your best foot forward.

Keep reading for more info or click here for more information and registration.

Tired? Slouching? 5 Ways to Help Your Posture

JESHOOTS.COM

Do you ever feel tired and stressed and then you start to slouch?

Especially on the computer...

And so you pull your shoulders back and try to sit up straighter only to find you're slouching again a minute later?

Fatigue isn't the only reason for slouching, but it often makes it worse.

So what do you do if you don't have time to take a nap, you're stressed trying to finish something by a deadline, or you're at the office and it's just not possible?

Here are some tips for how to save your posture when you're tired:

1) Don't fight the slouch. It seems to be common understanding these days that slouching is to be avoided at all costs. I'm not saying that it's good, but trying really hard to hold yourself up isn't good either. It will probably make you feel stiff, short of breath, uncomfortable, and more tired...and then you might want to slouch even more. Let yourself slouch just a little and think of being internally expansive within the slouch.

2) Sit back. Are you trying to sit on the edge of your seat or are you leaning on your desk? Pull your chair closer to the desk. Move the screen closer, if you can, and lean back in your chair as you work. Relax onto the chair and let it support you. Sit all the way back and don't slide.

3) Get up and move. Even if it's just to go to the break room and back. I'm sure you've thought of this, but sometimes it's hard to actually do. You might need a reminder...an alarm, notification, or a buddy to take scheduled breaks with.

4) Maintain a soft focus. Trying to hard to concentrate, which might be more likely to happen when you're tired or stresses can lead to more tension and strain in the body, especially the neck and shoulders. When you look at your screen, think of letting what you see on your screen come to you rather than going toward it.

5) Take a rest and tune in to your body. If you can take a 10-minute break, try one of my audio guides sitting or lying down. If you work from home, why not lie down? Click here for my sitting guide, and here for my lying down guide.

Don’t let fatigue dictate your posture! Explore our Free Training 'The Hidden Reason Why You Struggle To Fix Your Posture' for insights into maintaining balance and comfort.

Want to learn more? Check out information on my upcoming classes and private lessons.

How not to get carried away!

Do you ever get carried away?

I really enjoy the expression because it conjures an image of a person getting whisked off of their feet by the wind, like in a scene from Mary Poppins and it highlights very clearly what is missing when we act unconsciously: a sense of being grounded.

The dictionary definition is simply, "to loose self-control"...and the expression can be applied quite widely. You could get carried away by eating an entire bag of chips, working for 10 hours without taking a break, shopping beyond your budget, putting your foot in your mouth (another funny idiom), or even becoming so enthusiastic or about something that you loose all sense of reason.

Have you every felt carried away during a conversation with a friend, family member, or date? How about during a job interview, giving a talk, or in another situation in which you'd like to come across well, but somehow your mouth seems to be talking without the consent of the rest of you. Maybe your arms, head, or legs are moving and you don't know why. You feel short of breath. You hear what you're saying, but you don't really feel in control of it...and by control, I don't mean overanalyzing or micromanaging.

It's more like stuff's just happening and you don't feel in command. Maybe you're nervous, excited, or both...or maybe neither and it's just habit. Or you see yourself on video and realize that you're not conveying what you felt you were.

If this sounds like you, it's time to get your hands on the wheel and steer the car while you're driving it!

I used to have a re-occurring nightmare as a child that I was trying to drive a car before I knew how and and it was going fast and out of control. Once I actually learned to drive, I continued having the same dream, but my brain cleverly changed it so that I'd have a new challenge of driving from the back seat, reaching into the front seat to steer and to try and see the road. It was a very similar feeling as to how I'd feel if I were trying to put my best foot forward in a social or work situation, but I felt totally discombobulated in my movements, voice, and breathing...the overwhelming sensation in these moments being the feeling that I was levitating off the ground.

People sometimes describe moments of great joy as having a feeling of floating, which isn't a bad thing. The trick is that we can feel expansive, and rooted at the same time. A kind of grounded enthusiasm.

To learn how to achieve balance in how you use your body, breathing and voice when you communicate, check out my Posture Under Pressure workshops for women. Click here for more information and registration.

Change your Mindset...Or Your "Bodyset"

You've probably heard of the idea of the power of changing your mindset, a very useful tool, but have you ever thought of changing your "bodyset"? Maybe you've had a light-bulb-on "aha" moment? What if you could do the same thing for your body?...And it might even help with your mindset too!

If you always do something the same way and are dissatisfied with the results, it might be time to change your approach or attitude toward your job, exercise routine, communicating with others, embarking on a new endeavor, or dealing with day to day aches and pains.

Changing how you think about and approach things can be very powerful and sometimes what can really help along changing a mindset, attitude, perspective, or approach is a change in "bodyset". By "bodyset" I mean your physical habits. Your way of holding yourself up, moving, body language, and generally how you feel and respond in the world. "Bodyset" could be described as posture. Your posture is part of the dynamic way you use your body. There isn't one right position. People are constantly in motion, interacting and responding (Even at your computer). You can be dynamic in your thinking and in how you use your body from moment to moment and the trick is to do it in a way that's still spontaneous, but not wrapped up in habits that aren't serving you.

When I was 13, I was fitted for a back brace to prevent my scoliosis from getting worse. It was terribly uncomfortable and I was told I'd get used to it. I wore it for five years and I did adapt to it, but not because it became comfortable. What I got used to was the discomfort, which eventually felt normal. The discomfort continued long after wearing the brace and as a result of having worn it, I was functioning less than optimally. In my mind I had things I wanted to accomplish, but I'd fall short because my bodyset was telling me to make my number one priority getting out of discomfort. If I tried to push through how I felt, I'd end up feeling more exhausted and uncomfortable...affecting from professional endeavors, to exercise, to socializing.

When I started taking Alexander Technique lessons, I realized that my struggles weren't do to any person flaws. I was simply using a lot of misplaced effort just to hold myself up, so it was really hard to be present and I got tired really easily. I think I was creating the sensations of wearing the brace by stiffening my body and straighten myself out. This was very inefficient and exhausting, resulting in a lot of discomfort, tension, and feeling short of breath.

Letting go of these postural habits, changed my "bodyset" and in turn my mindset. I realized I could feel less tense and stressed, more clear-headed, more confident...and accomplish more without getting as tired.

The Alexander Technique gave me the awareness of my habits and the "how" for changing them. I learned to sense more clearly in my body, to start to create a more accurate roadmap to replace the misguidance I'd had from the brace. Any physical habit that isn't useful is kind of like a brace that isn't needed, but if you take it off, it's helpful to learn how to manage without it in a way that feels natural and better.

There's no one right way to begin to make positive changes in your life, but one way is to change your "bodyset". Changing your posture and how your move can improve how you feel, and in turn how you think and what actions you take...which you might call changing your mindset!

The Posture Game Tips for Improving Your Posture at Your Desk Without Over-Focusing

When we're trying to change physical habits, it would seem logical that we would pay attention to our bodies, which can be helpful for re-educating posture and movement patterns. How you do it is the tricky part.

If you focus so intensely that you become stiff and barely breathe in order to try to "feel" where your body is in space, this could become another posture problem rather than a solution.

Actors, dancers, musicians and athletes all use what they learn from Alexander Technique lessons to great effect and they wouldn't be able to do so if they had to stop and concentrate in order to stand, sit, and move better.

So how can you focus on your posture and movements without FOCUSING?

What can be more helpful than intense, direct focus on your body is more of a general spatial awareness, which includes your physical space (your body) and your environment.

Our relationship to our environment affects how we take up space and our posture can be dramatically affected by how we focus our attention. Here are two examples...

1. At the computer
A lot of visual stimuli in front of you
Tuning out of environmental sounds
Static positions maintained for long period
Aside from the screen, surrounding environment generally remains rather static
No need to pay attention to or respond what's going on around you other than what appears on the screen.
Reduced awareness of body


2. Playing a team sport
Visual and auditory stimuli (that must be paid attention to) coming from all directions
Frequent movement
Even when not moving, players are in a state of readiness, prepared to move in any direction to hit a ball, catch a pass, or protect a goal.
Heightened awareness of where your body is in space

The person at the desk and the person on the field are each focused on an activity...a game and and email or spreadsheet....It's just that the game inherently requires more 3-dimensional attention.

By attention, I don't mean concentrating, over-focusing, or trying really hard to feel what's right. I simply mean that you can put more attention on more of the information that your senses are taking in to avoid being absorbed by the glowing screen.

Stop what you're doing for a moment and imagine that someone might be throwing a ball to you from any direction and see if it changes how you hold your body. Do you feel a bit more 3D? Are you sitting taller? Do you have more of a sense of readiness...like you could move in any direction?

Now really focus on your screen. What does that do?

Go back to imagining the ball...

Different, right?

Now try doing both at the same time

As you're reading this, do you hear any sounds around you? Just notice them. Do you feel your bottom on what you're sitting on if you're sitting?
Can you sense your feet on the floor?
Your back on the back of your chair?
Do you see anything in your peripheral vision?
Acknowledge that there is space above your head.
Don't focus on these sensations. Just take note that they are there. Simply notice that you are in three-dimensional space by tuning in a little bit.
Do you feel a little bit like you did when you imagined that you were going to catch a ball?

Play around with expanding your attention, even a little bit. Make it a game! I'm not saying that every athlete or performer has perfect posture, but you can use this playful strategy to create better conditions for improving yours.

Balanced Posture = Ease and Confidence

When you speak with people how much space do you maintain between you? Is there a right amount of space?

If you're a fan of Seinfeld, you may have seen the episode with the "close talker"...Even if you haven't seen the episode, the name kind of says it all. There's a character who seems to need much less personal space than what is the cultural norm. Maybe you've talked with a "close talker" or visited a culture where people tend to "talk closer" or farther than what you're accustomed to. My point here is, that most of us tend to have a sense of how much space we want between ourselves and the people we're conversing with.

What I find particularly noteworthy is that not only do we create space by how far we stand from someone, but we also create it with our posture.

Centered, balanced posture can have a present and inviting effect on communication. The person is neither pushing toward (close-talking) nor pulling away (far-talking) from the person they are speaking with.

The trick is to know what centered, balanced, posture feels like. If you're not used to it, how to get there might seem confusing. You might feel tempted to try to stand up straight by lifting your chest and pulling your shoulders back. Holding this position will make you tilt backwards, pulling away from the other person, making you a "far talker". You also might feel stiff or short of breath if you stand this way...less present, centered and calm. This held, pulled back posture can come across as disconnected.

If you'd like to be able to use your power and communicate effectively or be a receptive active listener, holding a stiff, "far talker" posture won't help. Maintaining a centered presence that invites the other person or audience to connect with you will.

Creating a connection allows you to communicate powerfully with ease and confidence. Holding a stiff pose does not and it all starts with your posture and breathing, whether you are speaking with an audience of 1 or 1,000.

Next time you speak with someone or talk in front of a group, see if you can notice where you position your body. Also, you might notice it changes in different situations.

To begin to create a balance posture when speaking, start with balancing your weight as evenly as you can on your feet. It's ok to shift your weight from time to time, but if you tend to habitually stay back on your heels, forward on your toes, or always on one foot, experiment with balancing it out more. Also, check out my upcoming workshops, Posture Under Pressure: Command Your Presence with Effective Communication.

A Different Way to Fix Your Posture

Have you ever learned a musical instrument? A dance? How to drive or ride a bike? You'd probably agree with me that these are all skills that take some time and practice to learn.

Improving your posture and how you move is no different. It's a skill, it's nuanced, and it takes time and practice.

If you've been trying to pull you're shoulders back and hold them there and that's not working, it's not because your posture is inherently terrible. It's because you need a different strategy. What does work is simple, but involves more subtle adjustments.

Often we're not tuned in to how to make subtle adjustments, so we go from one position that we don't like to another one that isn't comfortable.

There is another way, but it takes some focus and practice. Once you start to get it though, you'll find it's a lot easier and more effective than trying for the quick fix.

Here's something to start to notice so that you can begin making some subtle adjustments. Start to pay attention to where your eyes are. Do you tend to look down a lot? Strain to look at the computer? Odds are that your head follows your eyes. If you're pulling your head back, forward, or down a lot of the time, this can be one of the main sources of poor posture.

Give that a try and check out my lessons and classes to learn more.

How Your Butt Affects Your Posture

Did you ever think that your butt had anything to do with your posture, how you move, or the body language you convey?

How do you feel about your butt? Do you change how you stand and move based on how you perceive it? Or the opposite...Is your backside an area that you're not so kinesthetically aware of because you don't see it easily?

Last week I spoke with writer, Heather Radke on this topic...butts and our bodies in general...how we feel about them and how our physical response to these feelings affects our posture, movement, and how effectively we connect and communicate with others.

Heather talks about the importance of "having a reality-based idea of where your body is space and how your body looks...to move it in a way that is more functional"...and which can help you feel better about yourself!

So when I say "butts", I'm not just talking about whether or not you've worked you glutes in your last work-out. It's more like how you feel about your butt or any part of your body that you might think is too big, too small, or attracts too much attention.

When we try to hide part of our shape we tend to unconsciously move our bodies into another shape. This new shape may be tense, compressed, and restrict healthy posture and movement.

Heather is a writer living in NYC and she's working on a book on the cultural history of the female butt. Check out our conversation below.

And...check out my workshop for women on posture and communication...Posture Under Pressure: Command Your Presence for Effective Communication,

What does "take up your space" really mean?...and how do you do it?

"TAKE UP YOUR SPACE!" What does that mean?

Recently I've been writing about words and phrases that we often hear relating to confidence, how we come across, and how we hold our bodies.

If you missed my last one, click here to read my take on the often uttered phrase, "Fake it til you make it".

Today's phrase of the week is, "Take up your space." This is one I'm very fond of and use a lot when I'm teaching, but often I see it is misused when applied without guidance.

Have you ever heard this phrase or tried to "take up your space"? What did you do to try and make that happen?

The funny thing is that see a lot of folks taking up less space when they are trying to take up more. It's very similar to the knee-jerk response that people often have to being told to "Stand up straight!"

Here's an example. Jane is told that she should take up more space so that she "commands the room" (another catch phrase) when she speaks, so she lifts her chin and her chest and pulls her shoulders back. Try this in front of a mirror, look from the side and see if you can observe the following: When assume this position, you are pulling your head back and down and you're tipping your back back and down. Jane in our example is actually making herself shorter and pulling away from "the room".

In this example, let's say "the room" could be an audience of 1,000 or one person. This may seem like a small movement, but our posture, breathing, and body position effect how we come across and how people feel around us

What else?

By holding this posture, she's throwing her weight back, which disconnects the font part of her feet from the ground. Less connection to the ground makes her feel unstable and like she has to tense things like the neck, shoulders, and back to hold herself up. The stiffness she's creating in her body also makes her short of breath.

So, why is lifting the chest and the chin and pulling the shoulders back the common go-to for fixing posture, taking up space, and commanding a room?

The short answer is that we tend to be very aware of the fronts of our bodies, so we do something with the front, unaware of how we're actually moving in three dimensions. Slouching is feared and very visibly happens in the front, so people want to pull in the opposite direction. It's a quick fix that doesn't work and might have the exact opposite effect of it's intended purpose. They end up "hiding" the slouch in the back and affecting their ability to be really present...because they are literally moving away from the person or people they are engaging with.

Truly taking up your space means taking up your space in all directions...top, bottom, front, back, sides. It means being grounded, relaxed, and able to breath freely.

Here a few tips for how to start taking up your space:
1. Locate the top of your head. A tap with your finger will remind you that the top of your body isn't where your eyes are.
2. Imagine arrows on the sides of your shoulder pointing out to the sides. Just imagine them. Don't pull them or over-focus on your shoulders. Just bring up the image of taking up space out to the sides. Avoid pulling the shoulders backwards or forwards.
3. Sense your feet on the floor. A simple background awareness of your feet on the floor can help you to feel more grounded and stable and in command of the room.
4. Make sure you're breathing while you do this!

Want to learn more about how to take up your space and command a "room" or conversation? Check out my workshop called Posture Under Pressure: Command Your Presence with Effective Communication.

What does "Fake it til you make it" really mean?

I’m sure you’ve heard the expression, “Fake it til you make it.”  I can appreciate it on one hand as an introvert who has developed skills for interacting outside of my comfort zone.  (My comfort zone used to be 1:1 interactions and ideally not with anyone particularly gregarious.)

But...I really don’t like the word “fake” in there.  What’s meant by “fake”?  Are you supposed to pretend?  If so, how exactly?  Maybe you don’t think you’re an actor….

I was an actor and as a young student, I learned that acting is actually the opposite of pretending.  It’s easy to tell if someone is pretending.  We pick up on all sorts of cues that tell us that, whether it’s someone speaking to us or on a stage.  

Rather than learning to pretend, actors learn how to refine they’re ability to sense and make choices.  Sensing and making choices is what we all do in life more or less unconsciously most of the time.  We sense (receive) information, make choices, and respond.  

In a conversation, we are responding to verbal and non-verbal cues and we respond with our voices, breathing patterns, hands, shoulders, eyes, and how we shift our weight and in countless other ways.  These choices and actions affect whether we feel or come across as awkward, confident, pushy, intense, reserved...they affect the impression we give and how people respond to us.  We pick up the same types of cues from others.  Conversation becomes a series of actions and reactions bouncing back and forth.

The way we use our bodies is nuanced and it takes practice and often guidance to tune into that. As a young actor, I was aware of this, but the way I was using my body and voice, the way I was responding and making choices was so habitual and automatic that I didn't understand how to change it.  How can you change something that you aren’t consciously aware of?  

Given my lack of nuanced awareness when I began acting school, all I could do was pretend…I would just try to do something exaggerated, while still hanging onto my old habits, kind of like when people try to hold themselves up straight.  It comes off as forced or stiff.  If they actually changed the nuanced habits causing the forced posture, they’d seem relaxed and present.

When I first took an Alexander Technique class, I opened the door to nuanced awareness.  Suddenly a wide range of choices were available to me and not just in a scene from a play, but in life in general as well. 

Over the years I’ve honed my ability to interact with all sorts of personalities and engaging groups of people.  My comfort zone is still 1:1, but I can choose to be effective and comfortable in many zones.  I used to feel carried away by the bouncing back and forth of conversations.  Now I feel more in charge of how I respond.

There’s a reason why Alexander Technique is taught at many prominent acting schools and it’s not just to help actors stand straighter and project their voices.  It’s to help them be in conscious command of their physical presence, choices, and actions so they can behave in an authentic way and not just stick a layer of "pretending" over a bunch of habits.    

Anyone (not just actors) can learn these skills, whether they want to use them to change their posture to avoid back pain, or to be more effective in the way they communicate.  It's ok to "fake it til you make it", but only if you can fill in the crucial missing piece in that statement, which is to learn what exactly to do to "fake" it so that it's not fake.

Do you ever struggle with adapting to different people and situations?  Do you want to feel more present, effective, and in charge of how you present yourself and communicate?  Check out my workshop, Posture Under Pressure:  Command Your Presence with Effective Communication. 

Click here for more information on the course.  The next workshop will be on Sunday, October 6.  

Your Posture Needs Your Attention!

Want to know how poor posture often develops?

Last week I was going through security at LaGuardia airport in NYC and discovered the same issue I encountered three months ago in the same terminal of the same airport...not enough trays...

This might sound like a routine airport annoyance, but it's what happened due to this one little thing that consumed my attention for about 30 seconds that makes this story interesting...and relevant to how you might be developing poor posture.

Since there weren't any trays in my line, I started taking some from the next line. As I was picking the trays up and spreading them out on the table with the people behind me and pushing some over to the person in front of me, I put my iphone down...and then a moment later no iphone.

I had just had it.

I rustled through my backpack and looked under the items in my bins.

No phone.

I asked the people behind me if they'd seen it and they shrugged as saw the woman in front of me go through the scanner. I realized that it may have ended up in her bin, which was already on the belt heading through the x-ray machine.

I managed to get through the scanner and catch the woman ahead of me just as her bin was coming out. Yes, the phone was under her stuff.

So the point of this story could be something like don't panic and tighten your neck and shoulders when something stressful happens, which is a good idea not to do...but what I thought was really interesting was that I got so distracted by the bins that I didn't remember where I'd just put my phone as it disappeared from under my nose.

One of the main reasons reasons people have trouble changing their posture is because they stop sensing in their bodies and unconsciously hold harmful positions for long periods without noticing until something feels awry. Where's my iphone?...How about what was I doing with my right shoulder for the last hour?

It's a lack of attention, not the kind of attention you'd need to do algebra, but a kind of sensory numbing or switching off. During these switched-off moments, you are probably ingraining these unconscious habits so that your muscles and your brain remember them as normal.

In my lessons and classes, I teach people how to be more conscious in their bodies. It may seem challenging at first, but the more you practice, the more automatic it is and it can actually be quite fun, leaving you more energized after a long day of work for example.

Set an alarm on your phone to go off every half hour at work and take a moment to notice what position you've gotten yourself in or how you're moving. Just noticing can start to make a big difference!

Practice To Improve Your Posture

Do you ever wish you could wave a magic wand, find the perfect device, app, chair, or one easy exercise that would just fix your posture once and for all? All of these tools may offer you some benefit, but they won't necessarily change your habits...except for maybe the magic wand. Did Harry Potter ever learn that spell? Posturoso Leviosa! Actually, I take that back...I think the magic words are Expecto To Practice!

Expecto To Practice because changing your posture is about changing your habits. First step is learning what and how to practice so that what you're practicing is effective. Once you understand what to do, then create a manageable routine.

Here are three examples of how to begin to change postural and movement habits by becoming mindful of how you use your eyes, head, and shoulders in three common activities.

Lifting and carrying
Phone, kid, bag...and sometimes all three! Keep the shoulders level and use the arms and the back to lift. Bring the child toward you with your arm instead of leaning far back and resting her on your hip. Don't hike your shoulder up to hold the bag and don't squeeze it in to hold the phone. And finally, as you look down at the phone, move your eyes first and then gently tip your head down.

Typing
Reach for your keyboard and notice what happens to your shoulders. Do they tense up? Pull in? Do you constrict your breathing a little? As you reach for the keys, keep your shoulders wide even as your hands and arms move in. Start the movement slowly so that you can pay attention. Keep resting your back on the back of your chair to help you not pull your shoulders forward. Move the chair closer to the desk/table if possible.

A laptop's screen will not be at your eye level if it is at an ideal level for typing (arms parallel to the floor). You could raise your laptop up on a stand and use an external keyboard, but if you change locations often, then this may not be practical. (Don't raise the laptop and reach up to type on the laptop's keyboard. This may cause you to hike your shoulders up.)

If you need to look down at the screen, use the same strategy that you used with the phone. Look straight out and then lower your gaze and gently tip your head slightly down as pictured. Don't drop your head or stick your chin out.

Reaching
Reaching for something high? As this is an action often performed in the kitchen with sometimes heavy, fragile objects, take a moment to make sure you feel your feet planted on the floor before you reach up. Look up with your eyes and let your head follow and tip back gently. As you reach, lead with your fingers, not with your shoulder. You're shoulder should lift last if you are reaching for something high up like the teapot in the photo. If reaching on a low shelf (like where the plates are stacked) there would be no need to raise the shoulder, or very little depending on your height.

Changing your posture for the better isn't just about positioning. It's more to do with becoming more mindful. As you replace the habits that are causing poor posture, the new habits eventually become more automatic. I recommend taking lessons and classes, but also Expecto To Practice! It's not a magic wand, but it works!

How Screens Affect Posture - It's not just about tech neck

Screen time is a big issue these days. I sometimes cringe when my iphone informs me how much time I've spent looking at it in a given day, or I'll check how many steps I've taken and how many stairs I've climbed on my phone's health app. The 22,177 steps that I took yesterday were all with the company of my iphone. I wasn't looking at my phone during my run, but it was with me "just in case" and I do feel justified as a parent to have my phone on me for that reason even though many generations beforehand seemed to manage without the constant possibility of contact.

I've written often about the relationship between how we use our screens and our posture, but here I'm going to take a slightly less direct approach and perhaps a more candid one. What really interests me about good posture is the way we achieve it and what it means about how we live our lives.

Yes, good posture can make you look more attractive and feel more confident. Standing taller may make you appear to have lost weight. It can reduce compression in the body and help with a pesky back ache or sore neck. It can make you less likely to get injured when you walk and run.

But despite the long list of benefits, the one that really resonates with me is that it improves how present you are. We could also flip it around and say that how present you are affects your posture...and presence affects quality of life and relationships and how you come off of a stressful day at work.

Are we really in the here and now living in our bodies, being our full selves if we're constantly attached to a device. I don't think so...and I'll freely admit that I rely on being online as much as anyone. So what's my point?

I began studying the Alexander Technique and working on my posture, movement, and presence 8 years before smartphones showed up and I had by that time developed a keen sense of how I was affected by what my attention was on. After spending hours working on spreadsheets at a day job, I'd leave feeling discombobulated and like I could hardly walk in a straight line. I've always been a daydreamer and very internally focused and looking at a screen amplified a sense of being sort of simultaneously lost in myself and not in my body. Sounds a bit contradictory, but that's what it felt like.

The thing is that I could feel what was happening and I got better and better about getting out of that state. These days I do rely on my phone and my computer, but I can tell when I start to loose myself in it in a way that takes me out of the present moment. It's like an internal alarm goes off. That internal alarm is one of the skills that I work on getting my clients to develop so that they don't come off of a day of work having absolutely no idea what they were doing with their body all day.

Think about your most recent day at work.
Were you tense or relaxed?
Slumped?
Stiff?
Breathing shallowly or fully?
Were you feet on the ground?
Was your neck strained?
Were you leaning to one side most of the time?

Simply being aware of these things starts to help you to improve your posture because you are starting to be present...to realize you have a body, when otherwise you might have only been aware of your thoughts and your screen.

And what about the smartphone that might be on you most of the day even if you're not looking at it all the time? Does the anticipation of the text, email, or alert distract you in some way? Are you lesson present?

Being away from cell phone service and wifi can seem like an annoyance at first, but I find that the initial annoying feeling soon turns to relief as I start tuning into myself, my surroundings and the people I'm with more fully. Have you had a similar experience?

If you spend some time away from work this summer and even time off-line, notice what changes.
Do you feel more relaxed?
Do you breath better?
Do you stand up taller?

Notice any positive changes and then see if you can consciously take some of your "vacation self" with you when you go back into work mode. We may not be getting rid of our phones, computers, and work stress, but we can learn to meet them with more presence and awareness and be more like our vacation selves during our work days. You can use a vacation to reset your internal alarm to notice whether you're present or not.

This summer I encourage you to work on your sense of presence and awareness of your body to improve your posture.

And if you're in New York City, check out my group class dates (the schedule during the summer is flexible) or take a private lesson.

How Your Feet Affect Your Posture

Hey city-dwellers! Are you getting out of the concrete jungle this summer? Not only might time away from your computer be good for your posture, but your feet might thank you for a vacation from walking on concrete.

Even if you don't live in a big city, odds are that you spend most of your time walking on flat surfaces and a lot of time in shoes.

Did you know that each of your feet has 26 bones and 33 joints? If you're trying to improve your posture and the joints in your feet are stiff, you're missing an important art of the picture.

Wearing restrictive shoes, walking on flat surfaces most of the time, and even tensing our feet when doing sedentary tasks like typing or reading can get our feet acting more like fused blocks attached to our ankles. This affects how we stand, sit, move, breathe, and even how we speak. If our feet our tight and narrowed, we're not using their full surfaces for balance and then muscles further up (in the thighs, back, neck and shoulders) will often compensate to keep us from falling as if we were standing/walking on stilts or ice skates.

Try this check-in with your feet...
Stand in your bare feet and see if you can notice where you feel the most pressure. Is it spread out evenly? Mostly in the heels? The balls of the feet? Are you more on the insides or outsides of your feet. Is what you feel in your left foot the same as the right?

If you're mostly on your heels or the balls of the feet, the insides or outsides, then you're doing some extra work to hold yourself up.

I hope you'll be off to the beach at some point this summer or somewhere where you can walk barefoot in sand or grass...or even hiking with shoes on. Walking on varied terrain is good for our feet and good for our posture and movement. When you walk on something bumpy or uneven, all of those joints in your feet suddenly have a chance to wake up and move!

Communicate effectively without "putting yourself out there"

Does the following phrase resonate with you?

We like to think that we value individuality, but all too often we admire one type of individual-the kind who's comfortable putting [her]self out there.

Not that there's anything wrong with being comfortable putting yourself out there!...but there might be a problem when one personality trait is culturally valued over another.

I've been reading a book called Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain.  It talks about how, extroversion is an enormously appealing personality style, but we've turned it into an oppressive standard to which most of us feel we must conform.

Do you consider yourself and introvert and have you ever felt like you were living in a culture that wasn't designed for you?  I have!  Don't get me wrong, some of my best friends are extroverts and what I'm about to say isn't really about introverts and extroverts.  It's about how we communicate.

How do you feel when you hear the phrase, "putting yourself out there"?  Here are some words that come to mind for me:

• Anxious

• Queasy

• Wanting to go home and hide under the covers (Yes, that's more than one word!)

The scene this phrase brings to mind for me is having to be charming in front of an interviewer, boss, large crowd, or other party guests while my guts twist as I try to imagine them all naked in order to feel less worried that they might not like me.  It sounds like I'll have to take up space in a way that feels uncomfortable or be loud, brash, and constantly smiling to gain praise and attention.

Let's reframe this whole idea of "putting yourself out there".   There's an inherent problem with this expression.  Why should we have to put ourselves anywhere?

What if we just stay put right where we are and look, listen, and respond.  What happens then?...Presence, connection and communication.

Regardless of your personality type or tendencies, if you are centered, present, and listening, you are ready to communicate.  This could be in the context of work, family, socializing...you name it.

When you "put yourself out there", you try too hard.  You step outside of yourself and leave what you most have to offer back in the corner, while you try to present what you think people expect.  Often we do this unconsciously as a habit and I work with people to help them notice and change these habits.  The changes can be both subtle and powerful.

Becoming more effective in your communications involves making changes from the inside out so that you don't loose yourself in the process, so you do put yourself out anywhere.  You stay right where you are.  When people feel good around others and say that they have a "certain something", it isn't magic and it isn't extroversion.  It's the ability to stay centered, which means staying relaxed and grounded, maintaining good posture and easy breathing. 

Centered-ness is contagious and people like to feel that way and to be around people who are that way, whether or not they can pinpoint what that certain something is.  It's not a talent that you have to be born with.  It's just something we get in the way of and can find again.

You can be a centered extrovert or introvert, but introverts might feel most in need of finding their centers so that they can learn how to be heard or how not to overexert and exhaust themselves by trying to be extroverted.  

Find out about my workshop, Posture Under Pressure:  Command Your Presence for Effective Communication, and learn how to communicate from your center.